I was one of those moms who assumed that when we had children, they would conform to fit our lifestyle. Babies are not the center of the universe, right? So when Max was born, I was pleased when he followed our cues. We were full-time youth ministers at the time which meant a lot of late nights. After he began sleeping through the night, he kept our hours pretty well, plus a few naps during the day. From an early age, he went to bed late and slept late. It worked for all of us, and still does.
Then Zoe was born, and that girl was on her own schedule! She was not about to conform to anyone’s plans, and had her own ideas about sleep and wake cycles. She demanded an elaborate bedtime routine, but slept pretty well. As a 9-year-old, she fights going to sleep. She’s the kid that thinks she’s going to miss out on something.
Pete has been a sleeper since day one. He’s almost 8 and still randomly crashes on the couch or in the van if he’s tired. BUT, like his Popa, he’s a morning person. Early on we made a rule that he had to wait until 8 a.m. to come into our room. He’s a cuddler and he’d wake us up by 6 every day jumping on the bed and squirming his way under the covers. He still wakes up before me and crawls into bed, but now he has to wait until Benny’s awake and says it’s okay.
3 kids, 3 different sleep patterns.
Thinking through this stuff has made me realize that our kids have some sleep issues too. Max had night terrors when he was 4. It was awful! What a helpless feeling as a parent. Thankfully he outgrew them after a few months. Zoe is a sleep-walker. We had to put a hotel style lock high up on our front door because we caught her trying to leave the house one night. Sometimes she cries and mumbles but we can’t understand what she’s saying. Pete has occasional nightmares.
How much of this is inherited?
Benny was a sleep-walker as a kid, and I have a long history of nightmares. Is it less about traits being passed along from parent to child and more about stress levels, vitamin deficiencies, and learned behaviors? I’m doing a little research and will be back here next time with information from some experts.
I’m finding this topic fascinating, but I’m nearing the end of this unplanned series. Bear with me as I wrap things up.
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